I think I'll start with an old Lewis Grizzard joke. And thanks to my buddy Mike Donila for suggesting that.
I remember listening to Lewis' comedy tapes in the car with my parents. He's just a hell of a writer and a story teller.
And, for the record, I don't hate yankees. But I have a friend who does.
General Sherman is on his way out of Atlanta after burning it to the ground. He's heading out I-20.
When he gets to Stone Mountain he sees a lone Confederate soldier up atop it, cussing him and the entire Union Army.
"We can't have this," Sherman says to his command staff. "I mean, we got CNN with us, The New York Times, and this rebel is making us look bad."
So he turns to a sergeant and says, "Sergeant, send our best man up there to get that rebel off the mountain."
So the guy goes up and a few minutes later he comes flying off the mountain and lands in a bloody clump at Sherman's feet.
Says Sherman: "Send 10 men up there."
All 10 are killed and thrown off the mountain.
Says Sherman: "Send 100 men up there to get that Confederate."
One by one, 99 Union soldiers are thrown, dead, off the mountain. The last one crawls back down the mountain to his general, bleeding from every point of his body. He looks up and says:
"It's a trick, sir. There's two of them."