Magill: "Absolutely the most improbable"

I went ahead and called Dan Magill myself. Mr. Magill, as you may know, has been a university bat boy, sports information director, national-title-winning tennis coach, author, Georgia Bulldog Club secretary, club chapter(s) founder, historian and guy we name sports complexes, press boxes and mascots after.

He was at the Yale game in 1929, when we dedicated Sanford Stadium. He was 8.

Mr. Magill still lives in Athens and says this past weekend's run to the SEC tournament title is "absolutely is the most improbable athletic achievement that I've known at Georgia."

So there you go. He said the 1929 victory over Yale was probably No. 2, particularly since we'd lost to "little Oglethorpe" two games before.

He said the weather probably helped us that day, as well. Yale is in Connecticut and back then teams didn't have summer and winter uniforms. So Yale showed up in Athens with heavy uniforms on "the hottest day ever been in Athens in October."

Mr. Magill also said his 1985 tennis team, which started the NCAA tournament as a No. 6 seed, beat No. 3 seed Stanford, the No. 2 seed and then No. 1 seed UCLA to win the National Title. And that all happened in three days.

Even that was "nothing" compared to this weekend's basketball tournament, he said.

Glory, Glory

"God bless these Dawgs."
- My buddy Shawn

I can't put it any better. Having not had the faith, I don't deserve to enjoy this SEC tournament title and NCAA tourney bid. But I think I will anyway.

And someone get Dan Magill on the phone, because this may be the most improbable series of events in Georgia athletic history.

Congrats to the seniors. Congrats to Felton. Congrats to the Bulldogs.














So I called up the NCAA tournament committee and I said, "Hey, where's the Final Four this year? 'Cause I want to make one of those signs that says "Next stop: Wherever the Final Four is." And there was this long pause and then they said: "Sir, are you a Georgia fan?" And I said "Hell, yeah! Go Dawgs!" And then I think they hung up.

Go read about it from some true fans.

Nazis... I hate these guys

I watched Raiders of the Lost Ark last night. Indiana Jones beat up more Nazis than Patton.

I once said this scene from Jaws was the greatest scene in American movie history. I was wrong.


Indiana Jones: 1. Nazi Submarine: Zero.

"I'll make it."

Remember, the picket fence is a fine play, but don't out think yourself too much.


Sweet, sweet March.

Of course we should apologize for slavery

These double posts are becoming less rare...

I wrote this last year, when the Georgia General Assembly was considering a formal apology for slavery:

Of course we should apologize for slavery. Every human being should.

We should be sorry that we don't love our fellow men like we should. That we let fear and hatred hold us back in this advanced age.

Martin Luther King Jr. was quoting Matthew most of the time. Who was, of course, quoting Jesus.

Love your neighbor.

I'm sorry slavery happened. I'm sorry it happened on my own soil, in my country. I'm sorrier still that so much of it, and so badly, happened in my beloved home state.

I also had these lines, which I liked. But I never felt good about the segues to them:

If you say "we" when you say "America," I think that's proof you owe an apology. ...

I honor all dead. Every man has good in him and is to be missed, and those who sacrifice for others most of all.

How to be a journalism

I'm speaking to a journalism class tomorrow. That's always a train wreck, so I decided to prepare for a change. And I went through a little file I've kept for years called "good ideas in journalism."

For what it's worth, and with not near enough explanation, this is how I try to go about my job:

Accuracy. Fairness. Objectivity. Timeliness. Context.

You are not in the business of making friends and winning influence. Writing about other people should make you feel terrible quite often.

Go see people in person.

Ask the same question of different people. You may have to ask them more than once

A swamp of facts is only useful if you answer the question on everybody's lips.

It's not always about details. Make sure you understand the core of a thing so you can explain it to your friends with complete accuracy.

Ask yourself: Am I comfortable with this being written in a history book?

Put little trust in facts. Re-examine their veracity from time to time.

Pretty much at least one fact per noun, verb and adjective. Think: What do I know, and how do I know it. Ask your sources how they know things.

Get as close as you can.
- The photographer's creed

If you're sitting there with nothing to do, call some people and find out what they want to talk about. Or go see them. Or go look at some public documents. Or buildings. Or watch an intersection work.

File open records requests routinely. You don't have to suspect something.

Don't be overly impressed with power. Or yourself.

There's a thin line between authoritative reporting and editorializing.

Be smart, listen and study. Be difficult to lie to.

No matter how high you get, remember what it's like on the lower levels.

The last 5 percent between 95 percent and 100 percent is the hardest.
- Brian Melton

We're not in the business of keeping secrets.
- Bernie O'Donnell

It is said that great artists steal. This ain't art.

Use a page in your notebook for texture: Sounds, sights, smells. Things that aren't quotes.
- I can't remember whose idea this was

Experiment and technique are fine. But the reader has to come with you.

This job is not about being a great writer.

You want to be criticized by idiots on both sides.

Dimly lit is good. Illuminated by a single bulb is better. Ask Mark Twain why.

If you don't think you've got a public service job, get another one.

The subject line, by the way, comes from another reporter here. He was doing a piece about being in jail and some drunk came up to him and asked "What you is, a journalism."

I believe his answer was "yes."

This sandwich is fantastic, you over-charging hippie

I seldom link the stuff I write for the regular paper here. But I really liked this restaurant review.

I heart the Richts

Seriously, I'm not sure it's healthy.

You probably saw Coach Richt got a salary bump to $2.8 million a year. Ching has some comments from the man:

He joked that his wife Katharyn is in Romania, so maybe she won't find out about the raise. Seriously though, he said he doesn't expect to splurge upon receiving some extra cash: "It’s just more that we can find a good cause we can give it to."

Better yet, triple it

I ran into Dan Fischer at the grocery store last night. He was a city manager in Colorado, now he works for Mercer University and is pretty much a (hippie) environmental activist/advocate for good planning.

And this isn't exactly what he said, but the idea is the same:

Think, in your heart, what percentage of people in this world are willing to put more into society than they take out.

Now double it.

What kind of world would that be?

For you Brothers fans

Just got an email - construction is officially underway at the Big House, the Vineville Avenue home here in Macon where the boys in The Allman Brothers Band lived for a time.

You know that line in Blue Sky - "Good ole Sunday Morning, bells are ringing everywhere?" They still ring there. Like a half dozen of them.

A foundation is turning the home into an Allman Brothers museum, and it's probably going to have the most impressive Brothers collection in existence.













Image: www.mamalouise.com.

But then perhaps all whammies are predetermined

Anyone else, when you're reading a book, just all of a sudden realize you're about to hit a really key paragraph?

From A Passage to India.

He had spoken in the little room near the Courts where the pleaders waited for clients; clients, waiting for pleaders, sat in the dust outside. These had not received a car from Mr. Turton. And there were circles even beyond these - people who wore nothing but a loincloth, people who wore not even that, and spend their lives in knocking two sticks together before a scarlet doll - humanity grading a drifting beyond the educated vision, until no earthly invitation can embrace it.

All invitations must proceed from heaven perhaps; perhaps it is futile for men to initiate their own unity, they do but widen the gulfs between them by the attempt. So at all events thought old Mr. Grasford and young Mr. Sorley, the devoted missionaries who lived out beyond the slaughterhouses, always traveled third on the railways, and never came up to the club. In our Father's house are many mansions, they taught, and there alone will the incompatible multitudes of mankind be welcomed and soothed. Not one shall be turned away by the servants on that verandah, be he black or white, not one shall be kept standing who approaches with a loving heart.

And why should the divine hospitality cease here? Consider, with all reverence, the monkeys. May there not be a mansion for the monkeys also? Old Mr. Graysford said No, but young Mr. Sorley, who was advanced, said Yes; he saw no reason why monkeys should not have their collateral share of bliss, and he had sympathetic discussions about them with his Hindu friends. And the jackals. Jackals were indeed less to Mr. Sorley's mind, but he admitted that the mercy of God, being infinite, may well embrace all mammals. And the wasps? He became uneasy during the descent to wasps, and was apt to change the conversations. And oranges, cactuses, crystals and mud? and the bacteria inside Mr. Sorley? No, no this is going to far. We must exclude someone from our gathering, or we shall be left with nothing.

A Michigan left to Whammyville.

I don't think I can really do justice to my weekend trip to Michigan. Although "weekend trip to Michigan" is a pretty good description in itself.

But the next time you think the Georgia DOT doesn't make much sense, remember that these exist. As my buddy Brett said: "Why have one traffic light when you can have three?"

His brother Scott says he's never going back to Michigan, and these are the sole reason.














Michigan: Move here if you hate sunlight.

Next year I will recognize the men's basketball team as existing.

I promise. For now, the season that never was continues in all of its "we can almost see .500 from here... but not in the SEC" glory.

But instead of wallowing in that pool of self pity, let's remember, uh, better(?) times.

Because this is hilarious.

Actual! Football! News!

Pre-spring depth chart! Pre-spring depth chart!

It will all be here before you know it.

The PBR lamp

Every now and then for my job I drive into the absolute middle of nowhere, turn left, and end up at the gas station / grocery store / bait shop that time forgot.

Today I was in Crawford County, and ended up in Musella, a little cross roads that mostly consists of a peach packing shed for a major peach company. It isn't really in "the middle of nowhere," but I love hyperbole.

Anyway, in this little gas station in downtown Musella they had all kinds of cool, old stuff. But one item, in particular, stood out.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the PBR lamp:













Never drink in the dark by yourself again.

The Racehorse

Lamar "Racehorse" Davis died Saturday at the age of 86. A member of the 1942 National Title team, I believe he still holds the school record for average gain per reception in a season.

He was a wide receiver before there really were wide receivers. From the Georgia Sports Information Department:

Former University of Georgia football star Lamar “Racehorse” Davis died Saturday, Feb. 23, at his home on St. Simons Island, Ga. He was 86.

He played wide receiver for the Bulldogs from 1940-42 and was a member of the 1942 SEC and national championship team. Davis was inducted into the State of Georgia Sports Hall of Fame in 1990. He is widely known for catching the 65-yard yard TD pass from Frank Sinkwich to beat Auburn 7-0 in 1941 as the final horn went off while the ball was in the air.

This is the AP coverage of that play, as printed in The Macon Telegraph on Nov. 2, 1941:

Georgia seemed not to have a ghost of a chance, but the ghost walked in Memorial Stadium before 17,000 customers. With three seconds to play the redoubtable Frankie Sinkwich tossed a sensational touchdown pass for a 7-0 victory over stubborn Auburn.

On the receiving end of the winning heave was Lamar [Race Horse] Davis who took in the 40-yard heave at at Auburn's 25 and scampared on across the goal even after the final whistley blew to bring victory to an out-played Georgia squad.

Auburn needs beating in the afterlife, too.










Image: Georgia Sports Communications.

For what it's worth

I had entirely too much to drink Saturday and wrote this:

Old pine trees have few limbs.

I seem to remember it being a metaphor.

Today's Lucid Idiocy

Just a random page from my notebook. This one, it turns out, was written just about the time I started this blog.

The "go crazy" line, in fact, is about this blog. The Mike Wallace thing is from my favorite car insurance commercial. "A Christmas Carole" may be the best piece of fiction ever written.

And I do not feel like a sexual dynamo. But I do snore:

God Bless us, every one.
- Tiny Tim

Hey, we're all contributing to the tapestry of humanity. Being woven, as it were.

I know you think that I might go crazy. And I have news for you: I will.

I got the key, to the Highway.
- Eric Clapton

Can't beat the world, he said.
Shit, I beat the world last week, I said right back. ---ker keeps calling me, asking for a rematch.

Isn't it amazing how women can just make the world stop.

When it's about Mike Wallace, the story ends with me putting him in the wall.
- Kid, GEICO commercial

Please, I'm like the worst suitor you ever had.

Almost all sexual dynamos snore.

Progress is often based on failure.

Those remote control boats...

The 009 best Bond movies

Here you go: Lucid Idiocy's official ranking of the best James Bond movies of all time, based on the rankings of our illustrious panel. Whoever ranked them highest gives their reasons:

007. A tie between Goldeneye and The Man with the Golden Gun. Of course, by all rights, neither of these should have made the list because we've got a tie at 006, too. But Golden Gun was my personal No. 1. No way it wasn't making the list.

006. Another tie:
Goldfinger: Bond at his swinging, gadget-filled, bad-joke best. With the incomparable Sean Connery (who was and always will remain THE JAMES BOND), the quintessential Bond Girl Pussy Galore, and the incredible villain team of Auric Goldfinger and his crazy, hat-slinging henchman Oddjob, this movie has everything that makes Bond movies so fun to watch.
- Erin Ivanov







From Russia with Love: I'm pretty sure I've never actually met any Russians, but isn't it awfully fun to hate them? Tatiana Romanova is just a first-rate Bond beauty, and the SPECTRE agency a perfect baddie.
- Keith Demko








005. For Your Eyes Only With the cliff scene, the octagon-glass-wearing villain, the Greek underworld feud and the gorgeous cross-bow wielding Melina Havelock bent on avenging her parents, how could it not be on the list?
- Me.






004. Diamonds are Forever
Perhaps not really the third-best Bond movie, but just the removal of the asshat George Lazenby is enough to put it here for me. Connery as diamond smuggler Peter Franks is also pretty fun to watch.
- Keith







003. The Spy who Loved me
Simply the greatest opening sequence in the franchise. The movie itself is solid, Bond girl Barbara Bach is fantastic, there's an underwater lair, a plot to destroy mankind, and the damn movie even has Jaws in it, people, Jaws. Nobody does it better. Or with a larger British flag.
- Me


002. Dr. No
James Bond in Jamaica? 'Nuff said. As Connery tries to foil Dr. No's evil plot to, of course, take over the world, he's helped by still the Bond babe with best name, Ursula Andress as "Honey Ryder."
- Keith











001. Casino Royale
"Casino Royale" sees the franchise come full circle from "Dr. No" with Daniel Craig filling the 007 role like no one has since Connery. Craig is gritty and cruel, and can carry off those one-liners without being cheesy -- but also shows a passionate heart and how that heart gets mostly buried with the death of true love Vesper Lynd. Features the best writing, storytelling and character development seen since the early Connerys. -Erin

That's not a bad list. Special thanks to my brother, Jacob, for realizing there should be 7 movies on it.

Your special demotivational plaque

I was just over at the Macon Police Department's records division going through some reports. I noticed they have one of those motivational posters - you know the type with some sort of inspirational picture, a one-word theme and a clever little saying?

Well, this one said "TEAMWORK" and had a picture of the Great Wall of China.

That's pretty fantastic, since the Great Wall of China was built largely on forced labor, and hundreds of thousands of people died during its construction. But I guess it's better than giving office workers the plague.

Homer: Thanks for giving me my old job back.
Burns: I'm afraid it's not that simple. As punishment for your desertion, it's company policy to give you the plague.
Smithers: Uh, sir, that's the plaque.
Burns: Ah yes, the special demotivational plaque to break what's left of your spirit. Because, you see, you're here forever.