Defensive shuffle: Looking for answers

Ogletree moving to inside linebacker, and some of the rest of what Defensive Coordinator Todd Grantham had to say Thursday, tells me a few things. Mostly it tells me to worry about safety.

Me: I'm pretty sure we're only excited because there's news. I'm still worried about a range of things here.

Joe: Oh, we're gonna worry. We're gonna worry until we're over confident.

Me: And then the losing starts.

dark season

Me: What do you think Cam Newton is going to do to us?

Joe: Well, the good news is he'll only play two quarters.

It is worth looking through the annual post-Jacksonville pain to the rest of the season, which I can only hope includes two straight weeks of trying to stop Cam Newton, and a win over Georgia Tech.

I'm sure you're aware we're 4-5 right now, but there's something to saying it out loud, and to writing it down, and to staring at it.

Joe: So say we beat Idaho State and lose to Auburn. That's 5-6, with bowl eligibility on the line against Tech. That makes for a dark off season.

So that is where we're heading, into a dark off season. One where Coach Richt has to make tough decisions, then defend them for nine months.

Arkansas: Right past our spike strip, and gone

I agree with others, who have said that was very much like last year's LSU game, without the bullshit call on A.J.

Sort of. It may have been exactly like that


After a while, you wonder why we keep getting out of the car.

The Dawgs showed significant improvement in Week 3 of the season. Unfortunately, they still blew it. I think they can beat Mississippi State, if only they will.

Me: That come back was like watching them grow up a good bit, but the defense seemed gassed at the end. Arkansas is a good team, they outplayed us.

Joe: We ought to rebound. At least we played like men. They showed improvement. They looked faster and more into it.

Me: I was hoping to have the 3-4 perfectly installed and executed by the second game of the first season. And I'd like to see some strength from the offensive line, and others, this week.

What else can you say? I think the reasonable among us can see that 2010 isn't in the record books yet, and that we needn't panic or rush to judgment any more than we need to buy SEC Championship tickets.

And while I'm comfortable with Greg McGarity's “I don’t really buy the notion that, boy, this is the make or break year,” Joe adds a caveat: Unless they go 6-6.

Time short for that August optimism

There's not much time to be optimistic. You gotta optimize it.
- Joe Petersen, l.i. chief analyst

...

Me: Reports of a "sluggish" scrimmage ... in which Logan Gray led all receivers with 3 catches for 70 yards.

Joe: You take 3 offensive linemen out and anyone's gonna struggle. I'm not worried about Ben Jones. The D line. That's where it all starts.

Me: And in a year that we lose three strong defensive tackles, we go to a defense that really only requires one.

Joe: It's a perfect time for it, personnel wise. And a change in attitude, that's always good. We need more middle linebackers. So, Akeem Dent, unhurt yourself. Darryl Gamble, stop being so effective at outside linebacker and, Richard Samuel, learn how to tackle.

Me: Always nice to have Branden Smith back.

Joe: Yeah. How did that turn out?

Me: Completely unexplained.

Hire Foley's apprentice, bring balance to the conference

Me: The Georgia graduate who's been training at the foot of the master? Assuming Mark Richt's OK with him, I think we should get that guy.

Joe: Let's call him Annakin.

This Damon Evans situation needs to end with an upgrade. I look forward to watching Greg McGarity choke people with his mind.

President Adams has a press conference today at 2 p.m. I'm assuming Fox 5 Atlanta, which streamed Evans' press conference last week, will do the same for Adams.

Update: I watched most of President Adams' presser. Some key points:

• Damon resigned, but it was "after he and I had a meeting on Friday."
• There is no timetable to hire a new AD, but Adams quipped that he'd "like to have it concluded today." He noted that "anyone that you want already has a good job and so you have to work with someone else's schedule as well as your own."
• "The first look (for a new AD) is outside," but that doesn't mean Adams won't promote from within. Still, he said, "I want an outside opinion to take a hard look at what we're doing."
• Adams is meeting with coaches and senior staffers today at 4 p.m. He hasn't talked to Coach Richt yet.
• Said he had "not had any reason to question (Damon's) judgement" prior to this incident.
• Said he didn't "know of any material facts other than the ones that have been reported" in this case.
  

Colin Cowherd jumps the shark

Chief Analyst Joe Petersen checked in with this on Thursday:

I'm listening to Colin Cowherd. It's a quarter after 10 and of course he's talking about USC. He was comparing Pete Carroll and Dennis Erickson to the lazy babysitter who let you stay up late and look on the computer late. And then Nick Saban is like the baby sitter that would inspect your teeth before you go to bed to make sure that you got all the broccoli that he forced you eat out of your teeth.

Just bear with me.

Then he went on to say that Lane Kiffin is more like Nick Saban than he is like Pete Carroll. And then this is a direct quote: "Nothing is going to slip through the cracks with this guy."

He said that about Lane Kiffin. So I'm officially done with Colin Cowherd.

Agreed. I'd be surprised to find learn that Lane Kiffin knows what broccoli looks like, metaphorically or literally.

Normally, Eric Berry would destroy Lane Kiffin

Eric Berry for Heisman . com would be funny, if it were possible to laugh at Eric Berry.

EDBS is the best sports blog, possibly because they're from Florida.

That is one of several videos on berry4heisman.com. Note that the "label" is KIFFIN RECORDS.

Me: A.J. Green is better than Eric Berry.

Joe: (Silence).

Joe: A.J. is gonna get his. Don't worry about that. I'm just saying the chances (deleted) are going up exponentially.

Joe: Our backs are against the wall. Either you're going to do it or you're not.

Me: I think this is a pretty good team. Good enough to beat Tennessee, then Vanderbilt.

Also, Washaun Ealey.. opinions reserved but, you know he was a Bulldog in high school too, right?

Hale quoting Bobo from Tuesday:

“We wanted his first time out of the box put him in a situation where he could be successful and not rattle him with something where he wasn’t successful and would lose confidence,” Bobo said. “But he’s very capable.”

Also Hale:

This week’s meeting between Georgia and Tennessee marks the first time the two teams have faced off while neither was ranked in the top 25 since 1937.

See also what Rennie Curran thinks of Washaun Ealey.

.5: over/under on SEC coaches fired this year

That's all I got. Also, Branden Smith is the fastest guy on the team.

I'll call for two new coaches in the SEC next year, though. I'm looking your way, South Bend, and to you, Columbia.

Joe: So, is your plan for Urban Meyer to win a 3rd National Championship in five years, then go to Notre Dame?

Me: Not especially.

Joe: That might be the best plan of the last 5 years.

Joe on the S.C. game: We were erratic

Lucid Idiocy lead football analyst Joe Petersen's thoughts on the weekend that was for UGA and the rest of the college football world.

We are just very erratic. That's the word my dad used.

Steve Spurrier looked like he did not want to be a football coach anymore.

Tennessee losing, that's awesome. Notre Dame losing, also awesome.

Next week I think you find out whether Lane Kiffin is flammable. What's your over under on Tebow touchdowns? Seven?

The Norm Chow / Monte Kiffin question was answered. They both suck.

Orson Charles just looks incredible to me. I really liked how Richard Samuel ran the ball.

Boykin? Word up.

ESPN showed Ben Jones and Joe Cox jawing at each other. You could read Ben Jones' lips and it just looked like he was saying, "---- you, you're wrong." After that, Joe Cox was the one who was wrong.

The horse collar on Reshad Jones was a good call.

We definitely had a few instances of poor tackling. There were definitely some plays that made you cringe.

My additions to this:

Norm Chow and Monte Kiffin do not necessarily suck. Blair Walsh is quietly becoming a trusted weapon. I'm concerned about Auburn apparently not sucking. It's not clear to me whether Arkansas is better than South Carolina, or worse.

Joe Cox and the offensive line will play better

This is my new logic, which allows optimism.

Also, our defense will cause turnovers against South Carolina. Stephen Garcia is not a good quarterback.

ME: I mean, Joe Cox has got to be better than that, right? Because the coaches have been watching him for four years, and they put him out there. Plus, in Searels we trust, right?

JOE: Yeah, but still. If that crowd gets bored and drunk and the offense goes three-and-out, you're going to hear some boos.

ME: Especially if the call on 3rd and four is Joe Cox right for a gain of one. You think Spurrier smells blood in the water?

JOE: I forgot he even coaches that team.

1996 was the last time we started a season 0-2. I believe that's also the last time we dropped a season opener.

The Kiffining of Vol Nation

I can't say I fully approve of my own subject line here. Vol Nation has never been a group you'd turn to for a knowledgeable opinion on much of anything. Still, there has been a noticeable intensifying of the sheer crazy from them recently.

...

JOE, at a gunshow, talking to a VOL Fan: Well, if you guys can just take care of Tebow for a couple of games ...

VOL Fan: Oh, man. His backups are even better than he is.

Georgia girls and Sanford Stadium: Your only guarantees in 2009

And Rennie Curran.
...
A couple of years ago I think Ford had a commercial: "The only guarantee on Gameday? Tailgating."

My tailgate isn't even guaranteed this year. A parking deck is under construction and the University has temporarily destroyed my tailgating spot to execute what looks like a bad ass master plan.

There are a lot of questions about this season, and we're going to have answers very soon. And that is what I think about this team. I think I was more confident about the opener 2 weeks ago.


Note the new red bridge, and yellow riverwalks.

...

JOE: What about Joe Cox, man?

ME: For all our talk about the o-line, here we are at the end, we're talking about the quarterback.

JOE: Can he complete 60 percent of his passes?

ME: That's the question.

JOE: Nah. Too many questions. But, shit, I guess that's what happens sometimes.

I think these are reasonable questions about The Dawgs on Aug. 29, 2009:

• Starting corner opposite Prince Miller
• Safety
• Defensive end
• running back
• Quarterback
• Offensive line
• Defensive coaching

Now, the question is, how many of those do you really feel confident in? And, if you have six or seven questions heading into a season, how reasonable is expecting great success?


Yes, I'm happy to announce that, one week before kickoff, my supreme confidence has turned to organ-gnawing worry. Worry with confidence at its foundation, colored by an excitement for Sanford Stadium. Now it's football season.


Not even guaranteed this year.

I say we truck these fools in their renovated stadium. Otherwise, what the hell are we doing?

One other thing: The University of Georgia Master Plan is to destroy my tailgating spot this season. But it's to build something better in the future.

I expect a 10 win season like anyone else. And if Tebow gets hurt, a path opens through the SEC East.

But that's a big if to add to 7 questions.

"If at all possible"

I am both baffled and amazed by this.

Potpourri: Nicknames, like the Internet, are stupid

Did you know that, in Jeopardy, the category "potpourri" includes questions that were not revealed in previous Jeopardy episodes because time ran out?
----
I have a book called Great American Speeches. But did Lou Gehrig give the greatest speech ever?


July 4, 1939. Note the large G in the background.
----
"There are more kinds of fools than one can guard against."

"In the last instance, it is character alone that makes for one's safety."

- Joseph Conrad, The Secret Agent.
----

Sir Charles Barkley, he ain't even got a ring.
----


Notre Dame has been trying to auction off a scoreboard since May 13, with very few bids. The jokes write themselves.

• They figured they wouldn't need it.
• Jimmy Clausen not included. Thank God.
• Home side almost like new!
• It's actually just for rent, because USC owns it.
• Weighs less than Charlie Weiss.
• Home of the 1981 Sugar Bowl runners up

----
I'm not quite sure I trust this. I saw it on my buddy's... blog, if that's what Tumblr is.

Lightning in Slow motion from பிரேம்ஜி on Vimeo.

----
ME: I wrote something down here a while back, and I'm wondering if you said it. Did you say "Urban Meyer. I hate him. He makes me hate Mormons. I don't even think he's Mormon."?
JOE: "..."

LIVE from Signing Day: YOUR home for the Bobby Knight Watch

Faithful Lucid Idiocy Lead Analyst Joe Petersen has risen early this morning to make the trek to Athens. He will provide real-time updates from Signing Day as the recruits make it official.

Is Coach Richt wearing a hat? Is Coach Garner having a chicken biscuit for breakfast?

We will let you know. And if anyone fitting the loose description of Indiana basketball legend Bobby Knight is spotted on Milledge Avenue, I daresay this blog will bring it to you first.

4:46: Bobby Knight for D-ends coach. I heard a report. Maybe The AJC will post it.

4:22 EDITOR's UPDATE: Hey, hey, Marlon Brown is a Dawg. Now that should put a smile on your face.

JOE's ANALYSIS: Word up. That makes this day a good day. As long as we got one of those guys... especially the 6'5" badass wide receiver who did not go to Tennessee. Marlon Brown. I like that.

Final wrap: No Bobby Knight sightings. A lot of anti-Knight sentiment from the crowd. We signed a good class, it's just disappointing that we didn't close on any of the big guys we were holding out for. I wonder what we'll do with the extra scholarships.

Signing day sucks. I feel like I completely wasted this day. I am retarded. Will that offend any retarded people? Are you still writing this down? Quit writing.

EDITOR's UPDATE: Jarvis Jones to USC. Marlon Brown rumored to Ohio State. I can't get Joe on the phone. He may have destroyed the Bling Pig in a suicidal rage.

2:07: Not in the Blind Pig bathroom: Bobby Knight, toilet paper or anything sanitized.

1:30: Huff just got here. He says Bobby Knight was in his psychology class learning how to treat players. As for signing day, we missed out on the safety from Tallahassee, the o-lineman from either juco or prep school, Massie, he went to Ole miss. Greg Reid, of course.

We did pick up Rantavious Wooten. And Jeff Dantzler is in the house, doing his show.

ME: Has he asked any of the girls what color their underwear is?

Honestly, the girls at the pig, you wouldn't want to know.

EDITOR's UPDATE: David Hale says Kiante Tripp is moving back to defensive end. Joe has refused to walk up to random senior citizens at the Bling Pig and interview them as if they are Bobby Knight. He just doesn't understand journalism.

12:30: Signing Day Sucks.

10:34: It is 10:34 and I am officially bored. I'm about to take the Blind Pig shuttle over to the Pig and go over there for a little while. Because this is boring as hell.

10:15: JOE: Breaking: Painted Head Guy is here. ME: With head painted? JOE: Of course.

9:48: Steven Hill picked Tech over us. So he's now a mortal enemy. It appears to me, from the interviews that I've conducted in the crowd, that the prevailing sentiment is we would rather have Marlon Brown than Bobby Knight.

EDITOR's UPDATE: David Hale says WR Marlon Brown is scheduled to announce between 3:30 and 4. That guy looked great at the Under Armour game. Brown, not Hale.

9:15: Also, free doughnuts and the sexiest blonde alive. Rantavious Wooten has signed.

9:05: Kelin Johnson is broadcasting live from Butts-Mehre on Gxtra.

8:45: Here's some breaking news for you: Beautiful girls still jog in the cold, parking in Athens still sucks and the Dooley statue is freaking beautiful.

7:31: This is not even really an update. But I'm actually reading the paper. There's an article about spending on football recruiting in The AJC. Georgia Tech outspent us? On recruiting? By $300,000? This doesn't make sense.

6:35: Uh, 6:35 a.m., and Bobby Knight has not, has NOT been seen at all this morning at the Starbucks in Douglasville. And, it is ----ing cold. I do not know why I'm doing this.

Yeah, like you want Kirby Smart starting at safety

Uh, no offense there Kirby...

Last night, Joe and I were talking about Dacula wide receiver Cameron Kenney, who committed to Oklahoma. And it was a revelation, at least to me, that Cameron is a white guy.

Oh, stereotypes. You're probably around for absolutely no reason at all.

ME: If you were to make a list of rules you live your life by, how far down would you get before "no white guys on defense" showed up?

JOE: I don't know, man. At least top 10.

JOE: I should really work on that, get those set down. How high would you put "Whiskey on Gameday?"

ME: It'd be right up there. But I don't know, man. Does that even have to be written down? Isn't that like making a mental note to obey the laws of gravity?

Obvious exceptions: Terry Hoage, Jake Scott, Charley Trippi and David Pollack, who I'm pretty sure is white. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

UPDATE: Upon further review, the irrelevant subject of Mr. Kenney's race may be in question.

Searels: Best coach on the team?

BRETT: Athens won again last night.

ME: Oh, yeah?

BRETT: Yeah. Kind of ran up the score on me, too.

In other... news, I also predict that Stacy Searels stays at Georgia and continues to be awesome. Joe and I made lists of coaches we'd least like to lose:

Me:
Searels
Richt
Van Halanger
Garner

Joe:
Van Halanger
Garner
Searels
Richt

When I mentioned he'd put Richt 4th, Joe wanted to redo his list. I wouldn't allow it.

Gene Chizik. Huh.

UPDATE: Blutarsky is right on. I'm about two more answers like that away from walking down the street and just telling people the Auburn Athletic Department is a racist institution.
----
Does anyone remember the Bugs Bunny skit where he meets Hansel and Gretel, and Bugs Bunny just keeps repeating the name Hansel like he absolutely can't believe or process that this kids name is Hansel?

This is what it sounds like.

That seems to be the nearly universal response to Auburn hiring Gene Chizik as their new head football coach. I'd be laughing, except for the very small percentage chance that it might work. I don't like taking chances.

ME: Turner Gill was the only one who scared me.

JOE: Gene Chizik. Who did not win a conference game this year.

ME: Are we sure this is right?

JOE: He was 2-10, dude.

ME: And not Turner Gill.

What would be even more fantastic, would be if Iowa State would hire Turner Gill to replace Chizik. But I'm not asking for that. That would be greedy.

UPDATE: Well, Kirk Herbstreit says it's an "outstanding hire."

"Auburn, congratulations. You got a great one."

I'll put my heart and soul into the rest of the season. Can someone ask Tim Tebow for them back?

JOE: You get any sleep this week?

ME: Oh, yeah. Tons. But I haven't focused one bit on Kentucky. I'm just broken.

JOE: I had several conversations that went like: "Yeah, it was bad. Yeah, it sucked. Yeah. Yeah."

JOE: Can we talk about something else? We can talk about selling newspapers.

EDITOR's NOTE: Both Joe and I work for newspapers. And we sold a butt ton of those things Wednesday because of the presidential election. And Joe managed to throw away a copy of The New York Times, then be surprised those things were selling on Ebay for like a billion dollars. We are both morons.

ME: You know what I think we should do? When we know we're going to sell a bunch of newspapers on a day, we shouldn't put any in the single copy boxes. Just put a sign there telling folks to come to the main office. When they get there, we tell them there's three ways they can get a Barack Obama paper.

1. Pay us $5.
2. Buy a 1-year subscription right now.
3. We punch them in the face and say "This is why you subscribe to a newspaper!"

JOE: "..."

JOE: Yeah, I'm just gonna get drunk on Saturday and, whatever. Alabama / LSU and should be interesting. Texas Tech / Oklahoma State should be interesting.

ME: You think our game will be interesting?

JOE: I think it'll be way too close.

ME: You think there's any way the team is in the right frame of mind?

JOE: I don't see how they could be. I don't know. I don't want to talk about Georgia.

ME: What else can we talk about?

JOE: Barack Obama.

ME: Yeah, he really whipped that ass.

JOE: As my dad said, it was just like Georgia - Florida.

ME: It all comes back to that, doesn't it?

JOE: The odd thing was, it was blue annihilating red.

ME: Yeah.

JOE: Yeah.

The Joe and Travis Tuesday conversation: Debbie downer LSU edition

Editor's note: Did not occur on a Tuesday.

ME: So, I don't know. What do you think... (sigh) What do you think about this LSU game?

JOE: We're gonna win.

ME: I don't know.

JOE: What makes you think that? the fact that Mark Richt is like 25-2 in opponent's stadiums?

ME: Yeah, but where did 50 percent of those losses come?

JOE: Yeah, I guess. (pause) That was Nick Saban's fault.

JOE: Put it like this : We're not going to lose both those $%#$!*@ games. So which one do you think we'll win?

ME: I don't know. The season could be over in a week and a half.

JOE: Are the odds that we lose both of these games, or win both of these games or win one of these games?

ME: That sounds like a math question. Why don't you just go back to tech?

JOE: Maybe I should do that. Go get an engineering degree and make a bunch of money and then set the place on fire. I could just engineer them right out of Atlanta.

ME: Finally something quotable.

JOE: We're just due to put it all together.

ME: I don't know. It seems like if we were going to put it all together, we'd have done it by now. Although, we did put it all together last year against Florida.

JOE: The odds are in our favor.

ME: We might have used up all of our odds last year.

JOE: The bottom line is they got two quarterbacks that would be third on our depth chart at best. ... So would John Parker Wilson. Oops.

For the record, though I told him to "get back to tech," Joe never went to tech. That would not have gone well for anyone involved.

I also took out the part where I asked where our offensive and defensive linemen would fall on LSU's depth chart. The ones that get to play. Not the injured and/or suspended ones.